Wanted: New PR firm needed to cap the well on #BP Chairman's Mouth and Shut-down Email

I'm sorry, but for a global company that produces close to $20 billion a year in PROFIT, its almost unbelievable to read/hear about the ongoing and obvious errors that keep spewing from the company's PR machine.

Oh, that's right; they have Dick Cheney's former PR wizard on their payroll now. Makes perfect sense to..who?

Who allows a guy that, even though he's the Chairman of the Company, to speak to the US media, despite not having a perfect grasp on the English language and related nuances.?

Yesterday, BP's Swedish-born Chairman appeared before the press as he exited his meeting with President Obama, and said (paraphrase), "Of course we have compassion for the little people in the Gulf area, and we're doing everything we can to help those little people.."

What about the big people?? What? He believes that the only people impacted are a handful of local residents and businesses?
Oh..maybe he thought that only children and dwarfs have been impacted..?
OK, so it was a language nuance, and no doubt that he was trying to articulate that BP is sensitive to the devastation that's flooded the area..

Rule #1 re: PR/Crisis Management. No matter how fluid a crisis (pun intended), make sure that whoever speaks to the media is someone that speaks the local language fluently.

Rule #2. Investor Relations. In connection with implicating emails attributed to BP's investor relations senior exec; NEVER...(can you spell n-e-v-e-r) use email to communicate messages that are guaranteed to be misconstrued, taken out of context, or incorporate opinions such as "Yeah, 15 people got killed when the refinery blew up, but the good news is that it happened on a Friday in front of a long weekend. By the time Tuesday rolls around, it'll become a non-issue with the media; we've got nothing to worry about. 

Here's an idea: Do not allow PR/Investor Relations executives with access to email, unless they have a certification in best practices and use of email within a corporate environment. Period.

While we're on the topic, I'm inclined to suggest that President Obama issue an executive order that turns off the Internet for 6 hours per day. That'll slow down the distribution of un-confirmed, unsubstantiated, or completely false news reports, and in turn, reduce the world's anxiety levels.

Oh..I guess Pfizer wouldn't allow that type of thing to happen.

To Sarah Palin and your fans:

While inadvertently tuning in to Bill O'Reilly (I was looking for the World Cup Channel), I heard you say " We need to bring in experts from Denmark to help with the BP crisis; after all, they have all of that expertise plugging dikes in dams!"

Sarah, I'm often apolitical, and just want to vote for the person that I think will do the best job; but in all due respect, with all of the money that you're minting these days, do yourself and your party a favor: hire an elementary school tutor before you go back on the road, and certainly do it before you speak to the media again..

Wanted: New CMO for #Chevy; I'm Sorry!

Chevrolet, not Chevy?? By now, most marketers have commented among themselves re: yesterday's leaked internal memo from GM's marketing guru Jim Campbell, the one that instructs every GM employee to stop calling Chevy a Chevy, and to only refer to that brand as Chevrolet.

Adding insult to injury; the memo suggests that going forward, any GM employee that uses one of the most memorable names in world history is required to contribute a quarter to a 'cuss can'

What a surprise the "new marketing strategy" was ridiculed by close to 50 million people within five minutes after the story hit the news wires and twitter pages.  But, we really gotta love how GM's Marketing czar shifted gears, and threw the car into reverse by saying "It was just a draft memo, and I was just kidding!"

Since I doubt that anyone at GM is going to engage me to counsel them on PR Crisis Management, for everyone else that's reading this:
Rule #1. NEVER email a document that you don't want to appear on the front page of the New York Times.
Rule #2. Read Rule #1 ten times. For the people at GM, make it twenty times.
Rule #3. "I was only kidding when I said that.." is a line that BP has already secured a patent for; anyone that uses it going forward is subject to an infringement suit.

I've crossed paths with Jim before; he's a good guy. I can only guess that somebody above him is sleeping with someone at the ad agency that recommended this new strategy.


TO: ATT CEO Randall Stephenson
When a customer emails you and appears to be frustrated with your pricing structure, its really not a good idea to respond with a letter that threatens him/her with a cease and desist order and civil action in the event said customer sends any more correspondences.

But, we love how quickly ATT did switch lines (pun intended). An official ATT statement issued shortly after the news media got hold of the story: "Because of this incident, we are reviewing our entire process to ensure a situation like this does not happen again."

Insiders are rumored to have said the new process will include automatically turning off the service of any customer that writes or calls to complain about service. That'll show 'em!  (Thank G-d I'm not an ATT customer!)

#BP and Bad #PR-#Parody Burns The Brand

We can only smirk when reading Noam Cohen's piece in today's NY Times; the one in which the Times belatedly belabored the story of a Twitter-er(?) lambasting BP with parody tweets since May 18. [Jane Wells over at CNBC spotlighted "BPGlobalPR" on May 25th, and even if Janey wasn't the very first journalist to trip over that parody tweeter, she was certainly two weeks ahead of the NY Times!

Why are we smirking? Simply because on May 17th, the day before "Leroy Stick" began sticking his virtual pen into the eyes of BP executives with his parody press releases, this very blog posted a missive directed to BP's crisis managers, and any other "crisis management guru" advising what they needed to do, before the likes of Leroy could gain traction.

What? You don't believe that we were in front of the curve? Just click here to read our May 17th posting

BTW- We apologize for the crazy "hash marks" in the title posting; the grey beards here aren't busy smoking the stuff, but simply following the current "rules" for the best way to get heard in the crowded cyberspace.

In deference to Noam, click here for his article.

And, since we're a big fan of parody (lol to the fake bernie blog), we necessarily agree with Leroy Stick when he says "Satire on its own can't get bad actors to act better, but it can attract attention and direct people to those actors and their actions.."

Click here to tune in to Leroy's BPGlobalPR twitter feed.

Bravo to Bravo!

I don't watch the Bravo Channel often, or not intentionally. I know that many people like being distracted from the reality of the world by watching Reality TV, but that doesn't make much sense to me. To me, "Real Housewives" is scary, and shows like that one probably illustrate why the divorce rate keeps climbing. Me? If I want to be distracted from reality, I'll tune in to TMC Classics.

But, as profiled in today's NYT, the reality is that Bravo has their finger on the pulse on what sells, when most entertainment content companies are still guessing and hoping that whatever latest idea the "head of creative content" buys into, will actually take home a trophy at the Up Fronts.

And, Bravo to Bravo for proving that entertainment companies that use risk analysis tools, actually research what their consumers want before manufacturing it, and remaining flexible enough to make changes to their product as their audience taste changes is a recipe that every media company should emulate.

Here are the take-away's from today's article..click on the title link for the full article.

The network, which finds and tests stars in much the same way that consumer products companies develop and market shampoos and mascaras, 

Viewers’ opinions, carefully observed and culled on the Web and pinpointed through more traditional market research, tend to dictate which Bravo stars graduate from ensemble reality shows to their own programs. The thinking is that they’ve already been vetted by the Bravo audience and the research team, and that they’ve already built brand awareness — so Bravo is, in marketing terms, just extending its product line.

But Bravo, aiming to minimize creative risks and maximize profits, is now taking these business practices to their logical extremes. Shows on the network aren’t introduced on a hunch about a strong creative concept. Instead, Bravo begins by studying its audience’s lifestyle and preferences — what is the market need? — and then creates shows and stars that reflect them.

Over the last year, Bravo has also begun relying heavily on social media to fine-tune story lines in its programs, so that each episode is even more efficiently tailored to its audience’s taste. The network asks its stars to blog, encourages viewers to comment on its Web site and post to Twitter during episodes, deploys text-message campaigns and Facebook pages for shows, and even studies search terms that viewers use, collected by research firms like Hitwise, to parse what viewers are most interested in.

Bravo just made consumer preferences the entire centerpiece of its programming mojo as it traded art for commerce.

“Bravo targets a niche audience rather than the mass audience of the old broadcast days,” notes Lynn Spigel, a professor at the School of Communication at Northwestern University. “Bravo is an example of the high degrees of standardization and consolidation cable networks need in order to compete.”

 

 
 

Potty Mouth PR: Yahoo!!#%*&

Those that have visited this blog more than 2x, and/or have spent more than 15 minutes interrogating our archives might have discovered that we're trend-spotters. Once or twice, we've even been credited with starting tidal waves.

We could only smirk at today's headlines profiling "Potty-Mouth" Carol Bartz, and her latest bombing with the F-word.

Yes, smirking at the below video will offend certain sensibilities. But, even at the consternation of my #1 fan (who is not an advocate of expletives in advertising, or anywhere else), we say Yahoo! to You, Carol!!

Your latest guffaw, captured by the news media and now widely-available across the Planet Earth, demonstrates the observations that we made right here barely one week ago; that Potty is becoming the norm across all forms of messaging, and proves the point we made: its a great shock and awe strategy.

Since the news of your most recent F-bomb attack has now spread faster than swine flu, you've become a top-ranked search term on Google (oh, the poetic irony!) and your stock traded up 2% today. Now, you need to turn on the PR machine, cync it up with your ad sales division and get the f**king share price back to $17!

Sh*t That We've Said..Prove Prescient

Five days ago this blog profiled the increasing trend in shock and awe advertising by using expletives within product marketing messages. A great test of this 'new genre' will take place this week, during the CBS upfront presentation, during which they'll unveil the upcoming "Sh*t My Dad Says" sitcom.

With Mad-Cow icon William Shatner starring in this new series, the theme of the show is in deference to the viral mania of Twitter; the story line is based on the real tweets of a self-described "shlebby kid" in which he spent less than a year tweeting his potty-mouth Dad's wittiest risque comments before the kid's twits vaulted to Top10 ranking on Twitter..with an audience of 1.3 million followers.

Presuming CBS maintains the same title for the show as the twitter page (which is also the title to the coffee table book that's now a NYT bestseller),  CBS is betting on the growing audience appetite for potty-mouth content.

Can't wait to see which advertisers pony up in the upfronts to advertise during this show--and whether any of them will be running their own potty-centric promotions.

Screwed By Crude; Slick Talking Down a Slippery Slope; BP's Pipe Dream?; Federal Agency Facing PR Fiasco; Moguls Muck Up Marketing Communications..Lessons Not to Live By..

For those that have stumbled on to this posting consequent to seeking a creative and crafty corporate communicator, the views expressed below do not (necessarily) represent the views of this blog's publisher. The following submitted piece is merely illustrative of our appreciation for witty, and thought-provoking prose.

Screwed By Crude; Slick Talking Down a Slippery Slope; BP's Pipe Dream?; Federal Agency Facing PR Fiasco; Moguls Muck Up Marketing Communications..Lessons Not to Live By..

wow...The headline (however run-on), tells a whale of a tale..and should be a case study for any studious (or film studio) marketing communications consigliere.


Sure, last month's Deepwater Horizon oil rig collapse off the coast of Louisiana, and subsequent environmental tsunami has (deservedly) remained a front page story since the tragedy first unfolded. Millions of gallons of oil leaking havoc on Mother Nature, billions of dollars in environmental clean-up costs and businesses lost, and most incalculable; the tragic and unnecessary loss of 11 lives; oil rig workers whose families will never be able to replace their lost loved ones.

And each chapter in the continuing saga reads no differently than more than a handful of previously-published, billion-dollar, Corporate Greed-Meets-Foggy-Bottom best sellers. The ones where truth is always stranger than fiction.


Or, as a good friend of mine likes to say, "Yo, LD! You can't make this sh*t up!"


In this case, we've even got a chorus-full of whistle blowers, perhaps saner, but just as prescient as Madoff-Buster Harry Markopolos. Each of whom were apparently trumpeting the "alarm" well in advance of the portending Gulf of Mexico oil rig disaster; an event that proved the sky really is falling.

For those that think that investigative journalism has no shoes (as in The King without clothes), and the profession has become a calling that's notorious for disconnects, and has been vanquished to the realm of impotency, we invite you to bookmark the CBS 60 Minutes broadcast from May 16; the one that will be remembered as the catalyst to a multi-billion dollar, multi-head-axing episode in the long-running history of Emmy, Grammy, and Oscar Winning Musical Comedy, HBO Series:  "Corporate Greed-Meets-Foggy Bottom."

More importantly, to the current and up-and-coming Marcom and PR crisis managing spinmeisters: heed the cry of yet another case study in which the defending team continuously punts instead of passing, bunts into balks, and has so far duffed every shot before Tiger Woods had to step in and suggest shoving all of the (golf) balls down BP's slippery chute.

Yes, the stories about BP whistle blowers have been leaking out for weeks; faster than the gush of as much as 25,000 gallons barrels of black gold that's been leaking every day not far from our coast line.

And all of opposing teams, including BP, Halliburton and rig operator Transocean have been doing a comical job of punching and jabbing each other along the way. Certainly no blame taking, just flame throwing accusations at others. That's usually a recipe for disaster for PR Crisis managers.

But, to disprove those that insist Big Business has become adept at sweeping the tar under the carpet (Toyota not included); crisis managers managing the Deepwater debacle are finding themselves in deep doo-doo. Marcom Maestros Take Heed! Don't do as they're doing; do as we say.

Within less than 500 minutes after 60 Minutes revealed the lead whistle-blower telling his story to the media for the first time, the first head has fallen: Chris Oynes, the Federal Government's senior executive in charge of overseeing the safety of offshore oil rigs coincidentally "retired" on Monday.

Hellooo??..Quitting your job now?! Amidst a national catastrophe and a firestorm of allegations? Sorry to tell you, but quitting your job isn't going to protect you from losing your government pension if you're ultimately convicted of a crime related to your role in this disaster.

Didn't you hear? Politico is breaking a story that documents the long-cherished history of your agency, and your office, of covering up safety oversights, knowingly failing to collect fees owed by drillers, and otherwise cozying up to oil industry lobbyists like panhandlers on New York's 10th Avenue.


There's a two chapter lesson to be learned from what's going on. Its in the latest edition of Marcomm 201 and Elementary Crisis Management. Here are the bullets:

1. To BP: Of course you're going to deny, deny (and deny some more) any culpability for what some fear is Exxon Valdez times ten. Two critical mistakes: 
i. Asserting your innocence in the face of expert testimony (and corroborating emails) from multiple individuals that seem to prove that you knowingly skirted all safety guidelines in pursuit of a faster buck
ii. Placing all of the blame on your subcontractors.

Positive positing is what sells, or at least saves the day. Stay away from the dart-throwing; your message needs to be controlled for sure, but you need to focus exclusively on all of the proactive steps you are taking. Put boots on the ground with bucks in their hands and win over the locals. You scored $5 billion in profits last quarter, so you can afford to spread some cash around in the name of Good Will.

2. To MMS. The tide is already coming in, and its carrying a flotilla of feisty ombudsmen that have already portrayed your agency for having a culture of ineptitude that makes the SEC look down-right capable in the course of regulating their industry. May G-d have mercy on your souls if it turns out that you let Chris Oynes retire with a get-out-of-jail free card in hand.


What you should have done is immediately suspend Oynes without pay, and without his ability to collect his government pension, pending the outcome of an independent investigation into the agency's alleged oversights of its oversight obligations. How can you justify such a draconian tact, you might ask?

Duh..how about the fact that despite the Deepwater disaster, in the days and weeks following, MMS continued to blatantly print out off-shore drilling approvals for the same area!  BTW: why didn't MMS collect more than $1billion of fees owed to Uncle Sam by the drillers that haven't been regulated?

3. To Sarah Palin: That new song of yours, with you teasingly moaning "Drill, baby, Drill!" is in bad taste, and bad for your brand image.

#Marcom#OrthoCenter# For#Crisis Management#PR #SEO Tips#Courtesy of #BP#Celebrity Apprentice and#Tradworx

For those of you that skipped the Sunday NYT, and went straight to Scott Turow's new book, you missed the latest digital news primer for today's world: one where journalists' (and marketing pundit) words are worth little (unless they're audited based on number of web visits to the author's article).

You don't need to watch the 60 Minutes story about BP, Donald Trump's Celebrity Apprentice, Lebron James, flash trade at Tradworx, or follow the tragic story of Emily Keyes; but each share one (and perhaps other things in common) for Marcom Savants 

When inserting the top 10 most searched Google-searched names/phrases in an online news story headline (above are the top 10 as of 3 pm EST today, May 17), you're likely to get exponentially more visits to your article, blog posting, or even a time-sensitive company press release. So they say.

Thanks to the fact that I also inserted Twit-friendly hash marks in the title to this posting (and pushed away the hash brownies), the wizards of Web 3.0 proclaim that I'm likely to experience 3x-4x uptick in visitor traffic.
Twit-friendly? Should I have said "Twitter-friendly"? Or, "Tweeter Friendly?"?    

BTW-Orthocenter is a mathematical phrase referencing the center of a triangle. Its now being used as a bonafide buzz word that apparently replaces words that previously described points of convergence.

This product is F- -king Fantastic!

Notwithstanding an April 2009 US Supreme Court ruling, which capped the utterances of "fleeting expletives" on public broadcast airwaves (ironic when considering the same Court recently proclaimed "no cap" on corporate spending for political campaigns--a decision that will undoubtedly cause a tsunami of bullsh**t to penetrate the minds of our masses), we were tickled when reading Stuart Elliott's column in today's NYT; the one that profiled an increasing trend by advertisers to incorporate risque (and perhaps 'rude') verbs, nouns and adjectives in the course of promoting consumer products. 

Shock and Awe. Hat's off!

Although my #1 fan accuses me of having potty mouth (to whom I apologize!), its true that I don't have a problem with risque, easy-to-recall ads; the kind that provoke sensibility.

What? We should be concerned about the impact on little kids, tweens and teens that come across ads that tease with quasi-expletives? Puhlease.

Prime-time Network TV has become no more risque than Playboy Magazine. You say dirty words in ads are"bad,"  but "dirty" images that show everything short of the very short hairs on Beverly Hills 90210 is OK? Don't be silly; The Genie is out of the Bottle.

I can see the banking industry ad now:

"Our Two Biggest Competitors:
1. Sh**ty Bank.
2. Skank of America.
Ta-Da! Its Time To Bank at TD..!"

Or the insurance industry's upcoming ad:  
" AIG = A--Hole; Call AFLAC Instead.."

Or, this new ad from the fast food industry:
"Our Fries Are F**King HOT!"

Financial Industry Finally Gets It: Web Video

Yes, we've been shouting for months (actually years) about the need [and pent up demand] for financial industry firms to embrace web-based video applications.After all, the most compelling content is about sight and sound; the more timely, the better.

Lo and behold, as profiled in today's NY Times, Thomson Reuters, the financial news/content publisher is launching a web-based video platform (described as a YouTube for traders) that combines video clips produced internally by the news service (about 15% of the content), along with clips sourced from a myriad of other news outlets (e.g. CNBC, Forbes, etc.) as well as 'partners' that include Wall Street analysts and trading market commentators from boutique firms.

The service, dubbed Reuters Insider, will only be accessible by those that subscribe to Reuters' desktop service, and presumably, this 'channel' will eventually provide advertisers with yet another way to deliver their brand message to a highly-sought after audience of uber rich eyeballs.

Re-affirming the the wisdom that we've been wagering on for longer than we can remember, Thomson Reuters Markets Division capo says "People are increasingly visual, and they expect to access information in that way. They want to be able to look at a chief executive and see the expression on the analyst's face."

Haven't we been saying that for months? OK..so we're prescient.

One of the frequent visitors to this very blog, a senior partner of the boutique broker Miller Tabak, was also mentioned in the NYT article for their role in serving as one of the content providers to Reuters' new service,  "We're dropping significant time and resources into video programming for Reuters Insider because we have to come up delivering information to a new generation of analyst."

See me; Hear Me. Buy Me.

The Razor and Razor Blade Business Model

We love stories about moneziting innovation, and we extend kudos to Mickey Meece over at The NY Times for today's Small Business Case Study profiling a shaver that combines a mini shaving cream dispenser with a razor.

The product is made by L.P.I. Consumer Products under their ShaveMate line of products.

The fun part of this column (in the print edition only): the case study is complemented by opinions proffered by marketers and entrepreneurs i.e. the strategies implemented by the highlighted entrepreneur.

I'd actually purchase this product--and aside from the many peanut gallery recommendations submitted to the NYT, they all missed the most likely silo i.e. distribution channel.
To Pete & Louis Tomassetti (L.P.I. principals)--ping me if you'd like to know my thoughts!

 Courtesy of the NY Times, here's the article:
 (click on the title link to web page that includes a long list of comments submitted by readers).
THE CHALLENGE To crack the $2.6 billion United States razor and blade market, which is dominated by Gillette and Schick.
THE BACKGROUND Louis D. Tomassetti and Peter C. Tomassetti, known as “the inventor brothers” in Pompano Beach, Fla., created and sold a line of marine signaling devices under the Safety-Sport brand. More recently, they homed in on razors because they believed shaving was getting “complicated.” They concluded, Louis said, that “the common sense thing to do is to combine the shaving cream with the razor.”
After years of research and development, engineering and patent work, the brothers took their razors to the military in 2002 because they had heard that soldiers in Iraq and Afghanistan were dry shaving. That first product was rugged and featured two blades, with the shaving cream in the handle. The military became a repeat customer.
Still, the Tomassettis found American retailers reluctant to take shelf space from Gillette and Schick. Store managers encouraged the brothers to improve their product — add more blades, they suggested. So the Tomassettis did. With six blades, ShaveMate offers one more in-line blade than its competitors, and it is the only all-in-one razor on the market with shaving cream in the handle.
When Titan 6 and Diva 6 were in prototype, the brothers took the razors to trade shows. While retailers were intrigued, they said that ShaveMate lacked brand awareness. It became clear that the brothers needed to stimulate demand by building name recognition and educating consumers on the benefits of their razors.
THE OPTIONS The brothers thought they had three options:
They could go head-to-head with Gillette and Schick with a national print, television and radio advertising campaign, supplemented by store promotions and coupons. Because the cost could easily exceed $150 million, the brothers dismissed this idea out of hand.
They could market ShaveMate on their own through shavemate.com and specialty retailers like hotels, airport stores and cruise ships, using their tagline, “The future of shaving is here.” This was the most affordable option, costing an estimated $100,000 to produce razors for the initial stock, displays and promotions, but it would take a while to build the brand and increase sales.
Finally, they could initiate a two-pronged marketing attack for about $1 million, looking for a big splash with a low-cost specific public relations effort to put ShaveMate in front of print editors and TV producers. Then they could begin a national, as-seen-on-TV campaign on cable channels to educate consumers via two-minute commercials on how their product could simplify shaving. The goal would be to have a well-known spokesman promote the razors.
THE DECISION The Tomassettis picked the two-pronged attack. All new revenue would feed the marketing beast, and the brothers hoped to build recognition quickly.
The blitz to send out samples and promotional material paid immediate dividends: ShaveMate Diva 6 appeared in the Love That section of O, the Oprah Magazine. Local news stations tested ShaveMate razors on the air. “Live With Regis and Kelly” featured Diva.
Producers of the Discovery Channel program “PitchMen,” heard about ShaveMate, and in February 2009, they invited the brothers to California to try out for the show. Billy Mays, the face of OxiClean, and Anthony Sullivan, also a pitchman, were the hosts who would decide which inventors had a marketable product.
“When we auditioned, they literally went crazy,” Louis recalled. “They said this is monster hit.” The brothers would be included on the show and Mr. Mays and Mr. Sullivan were both going to be spokesmen. Mr. Mays said, according to the Tomassettis, that he loved the product so much he was going to shave his beard with a ShaveMate on national TV. He would be the face of ShaveMate.
But last June, Mr. Mays died. His death knocked the Tomassettis off Season One of “PitchMen,” and, Peter said, “took the wind out of our sails.”
Several months went by. Mr. Sullivan assumed that “the avenue to market had expired with Billy.” Then, last fall, Mr. Sullivan said, the brothers called him back and asked if he would be their pitchman. He agreed, and his company produced the infomercials.
THE RESULTS The media attention and product exposure caught the eye of retailers like Walgreens.com, Target.com and Meijer Stores. On Feb. 1, Walgreens decided to sell ShaveMate in its stores nationally.
The first Anthony Sullivan two-minute commercial, which cost about $40,000 to produce, is scheduled to be shown on cable TV in test markets starting Monday. The Tomassetti brothers were added to Season Two of “PitchMen,” which will appear in August.
Meanwhile, Gillette and Schick are introducing their latest products: the Gillette Fusion ProGlide and the Schick Hydro, in what some analysts are calling “the razor wars.” The Fusion ProGlide, which features five blades and seven “high-precision advancements” (but no shaving cream in the handle) will be introduced June 6 in a manual version ($10.99) and a power version ($12.99). The Schick Hydro 5 ($8.99), which offers a hydrating gel reservoir (but, again, no shaving cream in the handle), hit store shelves April 6. The Hydro also sells a three-blade version ($7.99).
The Tomassettis hope their product, which costs $9.99 for a three-pack of all-in-one razors (and shower hook), will help win over customers who are paying more than that for replacement cartridges alone.
The direct marketing approach allows the brothers to pay as they go. If the test in May is successful, they expect to spend up to $100,000 a week on air time. The goal is to sell a few million of the three-packs in one year (sales are currently at about 250,000), Mr. Sullivan said, adding, “In the grand scheme of razor blades, that’s probably a drop in the ocean.”

Small Business Social Networking...and the Next Big Idea

Social Networking is necessarily the big buzz word for businesses. But, who/where can like-minded small, brick and mortar businesses owners go to for peer advice?

I'm talking about the type of advice that's centric to owners of small restaurants, car washes, dry cleaners, etc. etc. And ideally, a platform for forums, advice sharing that comes from peers within the same or nearby communities--the ones that share the same customers.

We've looked around the Web, and whether we haven't looked hard enough or deep enough, we actually haven't found anything that meets the above description.

We actually proferred this idea up to a web-based 'business broker' that specializes in bringing small business buyers and sellers together. They have a captive audience of more than 3000 "sellers", and 20,000+ qualified buyers seeking to buy an established business within their geographic area, and the value added this broker can provide by creating a forum for their audience will only make their business stickier...We'll let you know if they actually implement this idea..but its a good idea for any B2B facilitator...

Speaking of small business ideas...In a previous career, one that was considered to be a high-pressure pressure cooker (think Wall Street trading desk), several of us with glasses half empty would fantasize about a better quality of life career, and the idea that we kept coming up with was opening a franchise of bikini-waxing store fronts.

Of course, that type of idea is not surprising considering the testosterone-tainted trader mindset. And it should come as no surprise that several of us actually enrolled and became certified in the art of bikini-waxing.

But wait, before anyone lambastes us for being sexist, .now we've really hit on the next brilliant idea for brand marketers that like to baste ideas to the max: leveraging the new, and hottest trend in the bikini-waxing industry: Vajazzling.. 

Never heard of it?? Well, Jennifer Love Hewitt has recently become the unpaid spokesperson for a personal styling strategy that is, for lack of a better expression, re-purposing the most personal real estate.

Think about belly-rings in the navel, and move down a few inches. We've profiled shaving heads for advertising messages in this blog; and now...ta da!...Watch this video, and put on your brand marketing hat. Instead of simple Swarovski crystal, I'm thinking pre-packed crystal kits that are designed with corporate logos..Godiva, are you watching and paying attention?

See Me, Hear Me, Buy Me....

I'm violating rule #1; never blog more than once a day, at most. In fact, more than 2x a week is stretching the limits. Why? Your audience will be convinced that you are either (i) unemployed (at least 1 out of 10 are, so you're not alone) or (ii) under-employed (who isn't?) and/or (iii) a narcissist that craves attention and is suffering from the delusion that people want to actually tune in to your blog and read what you have to say.

But, when it comes to a topic that we're particularly passionate about, we find ourselves pontificating more frequently.

Web-based Video (for corporate application). How many times have we shouted out about this? You can search the blog archives, but I'd think you'll be seeing postings on this topic going back to the early 2000's, or thereabouts. In any case, we're compelled to point out a watershed moment from within the sometimes illiquid realm of financial services.

You see, banks and brokers haven't easily embraced web-video for several reasons. We'll overlook the issue i.e. network security, so perhaps the most relevant is that regulators that regulate the advertising of registered broker/dealers are pernicious when it comes to advertising collateral, and compliance departments at respective firms are sensitive when it comes to approving advertising content that don't have easy-to-understand rules to guide them.

To date, FINRA hasn't been able to come up with guidelines for brokers or for hedge funds when it comes to the approval process of web-video content..but now they apparently have...as illustrated by a press release put out yesterday by BarclayHedge...a media company that provides a range of services to the hedge fund world.   Here's the excerpt:


BarclayHedge, Ltd., announced the launch of BarclayHedge TV – a web-based capability that allow registered managers of hedge funds, fund of funds and managed futures funds to create and make available videotaped presentations online for current and prospective investors. BarclayHedge, which had begun accepting applications for its new BarclayHedge TV service, will arrange and oversee all aspects of its new video service, from scripting assistance to professional videotaping & editing to online hosting and updating.
“We believe this is an opportunity for funds to provide a higher level of transparency and interest among prospective institutional and high net worth investors.” Sol Waksman, founder and President of BarclayHedge, said, “We think regulators and investors alike will welcome a tool that allows them to see, hear and evaluate the people and the thinking that drives various alternative investment strategies.”


We don't know that much about Barclay's capability i.e. producing content, but we do know that NYC-based MediaPlace knows how to do this stuff better than most.

And while we're on the topic of video: today's NY Times Business section includes a half-page article profiling the evolution of Out-of-Home and In-Store Video:  "The Incidental Video Screen is Seen By More Viewers Than Prime Time," and asserting the fact that those little (and sometimes big) drop-down flat panels in doctor's office's, health clubs, lounges, and retail stores are capturing more valuable eyeballs than prime time TV--which makes that genre a superb channel for advertising to captive audiences.

Last: for those that missed the above points, sit back, watch and listen to this: 

Tweeting For Dollars...Blowback Mountain out of Molehill...

Even though Twitter announced its plan to push into paid-for-advertising back in November of last year...(we opined on that strategy on Nov 22..), according to one news media outlet, the blow back from the formal announcement yesterday illustrates that we tend to be slightly ahead of the curve..

"...Reactions to Twitter's plans to introduce adverts broke into two broad categories: relief that the site had announced a business model which might allow it to continue as a free service; and some doubts that they would be effective or popular..."

Since I'm not a shareholder in Twitter, nor do I have any investment stake courtesy of my multi-million dollar investments in private equity firms, I'm certainly not "relieved" that Twitter has finally gotten around to introducing a revenue scheme.  


For those (including myself) that remain dubious as to whether the strategy will prove effective for advertisers, or popular for those that eat tweets throughout the day, similar half-empty glasses that were around when Google introduced its advertising strategy were equally cynical when that plan was unfolded.  


Like it or not, for brand marketers, Google is to advertising what what oxygen is to breathing. You can't have one without the other. And that's what makes Sergei so happy.


Twitter says it will start with an impression-based rate card. I hate those. 


Aside from the fact nobody can actually audit impressions with any real integrity or credibility, if I wanted to pay for a mili-second's mind share, I'd buy a bill board on the FDR, on an I-95 section somewhere in between Westchester NY and Stamford CT, or similar, high-traffic stretches in LA, or maybe even Florida (The latter is a coin-toss idea unless targeting geriatrics, and unless you're smart enough to use 3 foot fonts for the shout out message). 


But for whatever reason, Twitter is following the lead of other high traffic web sites by introducing a CPM model to start, and at some point, they'll figure out how to introduce PPC; a model that smart advertisers will insist upon.


Which brings us to the topic of whether this new model will be embraced by advertisers. Of course it will. 


First of all, "social networking" is the marketing cats' pajamas. Sheep travel in packs, and those responsible for ad buying are frothing at the mouth in anticipation of sending out that memo to the EVP of Marketing to update them on the implementation of their Twitter ad campaign, and how they've already spent the first $50k allocated for Twitter ads. 


Do I think it will be an impactful way to promote a product or a service [from the consumer's perspective]? 
Nah. 
Everyone that I've canvassed has said they would never follow (click) a link to a product ad. Explaining why email marketing typically only makes money for the people that get paid to send out the messages. The ROI on email marketing has been dropping year after year for the past five years, partly because most people that have clicked on a link have found their identities lifted, or their PC's infected with malware.


I'd also argue that people that consume tweets are consuming upwards of 100 lbs of bytes a day. As a result, I'd insist their receptacles are overwhelmed, presuming their brains haven't already turned into mash potato.


That said, and as pointed out by a large audience of developers that create Twitter-compatible apps, The Kingdom of Twitter is rapidly moving away from open source to "Open-wide, it won't hurt a bit when we take it out..[for our proprietary use], and then you can close your mouth..[and fuhget about making a penny off of us..]" 


There is one Twitter ad strategy that I think is great; famous and infamous celebs are charging thousands to incorporate a product pitch into individual tweets. Brilliant idea! I know that my client will want to pay Paris Hilton $10k for tweeting about one of my favorite products

Marketing Makeover: You Change Your Shirt; You Should Change Your Web Presentation!

After noticing a NY Times story that profiled various companies in the midst of managing a PR crisis (can you spell Toyota?), it was interesting to note that the companies in question have made dunderhead updates to their respective websites, whether via downplaying widely-publicized recall notices, or inserting gratuitous comments that failed to fully accept responsibility for whatever it was their company did to inspire the respective PR crisis and the angst of their customers.

The article didn't intend to, but it did include subliminal observations about the importance of refreshing your corporate image, as displayed via your company website. Obvious? Of course. Another hit to the operating budget? Actually, it doesn't have to cost an arm, or a leg to make changes to your company website. If it does, you're doing something wrong.

Let's face it; we're in a makeover world. Our audiences wants to be refreshed, reminded, re-stimulated. After all, we get face lifts, body tucks, new hairdo's, we paint the house a different color every once in a while (forgive me for offending those that have been evicted after failing to pay their mortgage), we buy a new tie, we buy a new handbag, etc., etc. All with the objective of projecting a fresh, updated and uplifting message. And presumably, we're incorporating the current 'trend'.


This isn't to suggest you need to re-do your corporate logo, or your corporate corporate "tag line." Some tag lines are timeless. Case in point: ten years ago, we crafted the tag line for a global financial services company ("The Professional's Gateway to the World's Markets") and that tag line is still flying on the masthead of every single piece of the company's collateral (print, radio, tv, web, correspondences, etc.)


Makeovers don't need to be extreme. For example, installing an elegant video element within your website doesn't require rocket science, but its consistent with the current trend i.e. presentations. We love video. It captures the essence of our virtual/mental touch points.

Sight and Sound Sell. Its that simple.

There's no shortage of vendors--in NYC alone there are literally dozens of shops that can produce great stuff; my choice is MediaPlace, simply because I've worked with them for years, and they know how to re-purpose a corporate message better than most. 


Yes, we make it a point to introduce changes to our firm's website on a regular basis. Sometimes we incorporate a timely 'satisfied client story'. Sometimes we tweak the front page so as to incorporate the most current phrases within our value proposition; that shows visitors we're on top of our game, and at the same time, it gives a boost to our SEO objectives.  Sometimes we modify the layout and change the fonts.


Changing your presentation is good..just as long as you're not shaving your head or growing a mullet.

Marketing: Its All About Selling..I've got a great brick for sale!!

While this blog is necessarily focused on (among other things) "marketing" and related communication techniques, the fact of the matter is, its all about selling.  However entertaining it is to read about/hear about people that position themselves as "marketers", if you can't sell, then marketing is meaningless.

Its all about connecting the tag line to the bottom line, which means its all about sales.

So, it was equally entertaining to notice a contest searching for "the world's greatest salesperson," promoted by  OgilvyOne, a division of the icon ad agency WPP.

Contestants are being solicited to upload a video to a dedicated YouTube.com channel in which they demonstrate, explain, illustrate, or otherwise present the best way to sell a brick.

No, not the kind of brick that's slated to become legal in California as a means to increase the tax revenues; just a simple run of the mill brick.  Accordng Ogilvy, the most creative brick salesperson will win a trip to present in a live shark tank, and be hired for a 3 month internship.

Not a bad way to capture video resumes, although some will likely game the system and go back to research the history of Pet Rocks.
Here's my submission on the product value proposition, the video elements can be based on the following narrative:  
"We have It. You Want It! And it won't cost more than a handful of cement!"
Its all purpose, eco-friendly, non-destructible and here's just some of the things that  it can do:

• Open car doors if you've lost your key
• Gain entrance to back door if you've been locked out.
• Be used as weapon (no license required!!!)
• Decorative device/paper weight
• Door stop--or the Perfect Book End (for those that still buy books..)
• The first ingredient to building your $2 million mini-mansion!
• Anchor for your mini-yacht (anchor rope available for slight additional charge..)
• Tire stop for your golf-cart.
• Message carrier for industrial strength sling shots.

Ok..maybe those are silly ideas, maybe note...But, if you want to win the "best salesperson" prize from Ogilvy, they say that you should go to their channel on YouTube

Back to Business of B2B Web-Video Chat : Oovoo

Ok..so we've teased you in the recent updates by suggesting we could only locate (2) truly credible providers of low cost, high quality video broadcast/video chat applications...

We can't explain how/why we overlooked Oovoo.com, and we won't bother telling you how we tripped over this company...

The first glimpse of the application and the platform suggests that it looks good, its priced right (there's a free version and options i.e. enterprise version), but also reminds us that when it comes to B2B technology applications, the first-movers' disadvantage is the notorious obstacle that is increasingly prevalent: firewall.  

That said, we think this platform is a good one..notwithstanding the fact that for broadcasting, its powered by an executable that needs to be downloaded...and that element might introduce some hiccups..but we haven't kicked the tires hard enough or long enough to determine whether or not your computer might have a digestion problem....

Seeing (and Hearing) is Believing; How to Rise Above the Clutter

Video, video, video..we've been playing this harp and harping on the subject of businesses needing to leverage new media apps while their competitors are languishing in the world of traditional messaging techniques.

The proposal below was prepared by an agency that's been around the block more than a few times, and in our opinion, they hit the bulls eye when crisply condensing the client's already nicely configured value proposition. Equally appealing, the agency formulated a very cost-sensitive strategy that provides the client with an approach that will have extended shelf life, and can inserted in multiple applications.


Corporate Marketing Communications Proposal From Media Place & JLC Group to WallachBeth Capital

Social Network Advertising & LinkedIn.com Before You Buy In...Read the Warning Label

To: Steve Patrizi, VP of Advertising Sales

After establishing a PPC ad program via LinkedIn at beginning of week, it took less than two days to recognize that the campaign in question has been charged for noticeably more clicks/visitors than we have documented for the same period of time by two different site traffic applications that are installed on the destination website.

One of those meters is google analytics, the other is a tool provided by AMZN. 

After presenting this to LinkedIn advertising "online support", and requesting explanation or otherwise a credit, we were disheartened to receive a canned email reply indicating someone would eventually send another canned reply.   Surprising that you don't have a live chat staffed by people to service paying customers, but I suppose that would be a reach..In the mean time, it would be nice if someone were to actually reach out and address the issue. Would hate to instruct credit card company to dispute the charges...or to be the source of 'unhappy customer testimonial'

Thanks in advance for your reply.





To customer support:
This is the second attempt to contact support re: what definitely appears to be your double-charging us for clicks on recently-implemented PPC program.

After noticing that you have charged us for almost 2x the number of clicks than the number of actual LinkedIn referrals reported by two different traffic logs that we maintain,  we immediately reported this issue and we scaled back our program by half. Six hours later, we noticed you reported 2x the traffic than what our traffic logs reported for the remaining ads that were 'live".

Dear ,

Thank you for your quick response.

We do not provide support for third party web tracking or analytics software. Because of this, we are unable to supply information regarding possible differences.

We are confident in the information provided by reporting tools that monitor the clicks redirected to your site as well as our other reporting tools across the entire LinkedIn platform. At this time, we would encourage you to contact the third party vendor directly for questions related to their software or potential discrepancies in reporting.

Thank you for your continued use of our DirectAds product.

Regards,

Stephanie
LinkedIn Customer Support

Thank you Stephanie…

We didn’t suggest that you do support third party traffic log reporting software.

But the fact is, when two independent applications report exactly the same thing and completely contradict your reports and you respond to customers by insisting  that your charges are accurate, and that your reporting meter works better, or is more accurate than Google Analytics, or Amazon’s vendor tools, any reasonably experienced advertiser would take exception to your reply.

After noticing that you had charged us for almost 2x the number of clicks than the number of actual LinkedIn referrals reported by two different traffic logs that we maintain,  we immediately reported this issue and we scaled back our program by half. Six hours later, we noticed you reported 2x the traffic than what our traffic logs reported for the remaining ads that were 'live".

Needless to say, we will be terminating our ad program with LinkedIn immediately, disputing the charges with our credit card company, and we’ll look forward to sharing this experience within the various LinkedIn groups that we participate in, as well as the various industry blogs that we contribute to on a regular basis.

Best of luck in your career!

 

Video Ad Messages Now Playing on Your PDA--Duh!!

If you've been following this blog for more than the last 5 updates, you'll know that I've always been a big proponent of video-centric marketing and communication applications for corporate, B2B and small businesses.

We're not newbies when it comes to digital communication, as this writer was arguably among the first wave of pioneers that advocated internal corporate instant-messaging applications when most Fortune companies were still busy trying to figure out how to leverage enterprise email.

Then came blogs, next came Twitter, and while "Marcomm Guru's" imbedded in corporate cubicles are still trying to get their arms around what works and what doesn't work, the Rich Media train keeps on rolling over those that haven't figured out which "best practices" are best vs. those that make the bean counters barf when attempting to monitor how the EVP of Sales and/or EVP of Marketing are working to connect the tag line to the bottom line.

Click on the link to the title of this posting--and then read in between the lines. If you can't understand how this story underscores how to leverage existing technology with your "social media strategy", give us a call and we'll paint a connect-the-dots picture so that even your CEO will "get it".

Post script reminder: "Cutting Edge" initiatives often result in a little bit of bleeding at first.

Why KISS Makes So Much Sense

We don't typically re-print other people's work, but this makes for a good read if you're taking a long sit, or especially if you've got one of those new e-reader/tablets that look like Etch-O-Sketch devices and find yourself reading more on the porcelain porch..

Courtesy of Boston.com's Drake Bennet  (click on the title link for the full article):

This would probably not strike you as a great idea. But, if recent research is to be believed, it might just be brilliant.

One of the hottest topics in psychology today is something called “cognitive fluency.” Cognitive fluency is simply a measure of how easy it is to think about something, and it turns out that people prefer things that are easy to think about to those that are hard. On the face of it, it’s a rather intuitive idea. But psychologists are only beginning to uncover the surprising extent to which fluency guides our thinking, and in situations where we have no idea it is at work.

Psychologists have determined, for example, that shares in companies with easy-to-pronounce names do indeed significantly outperform those with hard-to-pronounce names. Other studies have shown that when presenting people with a factual statement, manipulations that make the statement easier to mentally process - even totally nonsubstantive changes like writing it in a cleaner font or making it rhyme or simply repeating it - can alter people’s judgment of the truth of the statement, along with their evaluation of the intelligence of the statement’s author and their confidence in their own judgments and abilities. Similar manipulations can get subjects to be more forgiving, more adventurous, and more open about their personal shortcomings.

Because it shapes our thinking in so many ways, fluency is implicated in decisions about everything from the products we buy to the people we find attractive to the candidates we vote for - in short, in any situation where we weigh information. It’s a key part of the puzzle of how feelings like attraction and belief and suspicion work, and what researchers are learning about fluency has ramifications for anyone interested in eliciting those emotions.

“Every purchase you make, every interaction you have, every judgment you make can be put along a continuum from fluent to disfluent,” says Adam Alter, a psychologist at the New York University Stern School who co-wrote the paper on fluency and stock prices. “If you can understand how fluency influences judgment, you can understand many, many, many different kinds of judgments better than we do at the moment.”

A handful of scholars have already started to explore the ways that advertisers, educators, political campaigners, or anyone else in the business of persuasion can use these findings. And some of the implications are surprising. For example, to get people to think through a question, it may be best to present it less clearly. And to boost your self-confidence, you may want to set out to write a dauntingly long list of all the reasons why you’re a failure.

Online Consultations: Get on the train or get run over by it!

Its only been 30 days since we last pounded the table about "now-generation" technology that delivers HDMI quality, live video consultations via the Internet.

In point of fact, we've been pounding the tables and screaming from the rafters on this very topic for more than three years.

Its only within the last year that the technology has finally evolved to the point where its top quality, low maintenance and efficiently priced for any small business, no less large business than never wanted to spend mid six figures for "enterprise video teleconferencing" solutions.

Lo and behold,  the NY Times must be following this blog, because today, contributor Catherine Saint Louis is credited with a column that focuses on the rapidly growing use of this exact technology within the health care arena.

The article is objective, insightful. The article title  "Should Surgeons Meet Patients Online?" is almost irrelevant; the debate about whether plastic surgeons should be consulting on line is tantamount to asking whether barn doors should be sealed like a crypt. 
The fact is, the genie is out of the bottle. 

And the technology that powers the technology that was once only imagined by The Jetsons is easily procured. We've promoted our friends at Montreal-based LCN Technologies on several occasions, as we think they've got the best for less..We've also tripped over a few other vendors...

Now all you need to do is research the questions that need to be asked of those vendors, and compare their answers and offerings.  

Opining About Twitter:

The NY Times' David Carr opines today that he's convinced Twitter will not only endure, but expand into every tiny intellectual crevice known to modern man.

We've talked, and even "tweeted" about this topic in the past. We've pointed out that a continuously growing universe of Branders, Marketers, and a slew of corporate communication gurus believe that Twitter is as important today as having a website was ten years ago.

Fifteen years ago, this pundit insisted to his clients and prospective clients, that if you were a business, and you didn't have a website, even a rudimentary single page that merely displayed who you were, then you really weren't in business. And you probably wouldn't stay in business for very long.

OK, a bit severe of a message perhaps, but pretty prescient nonetheless. 
In the course of celebrating this past Thankgiving, we opined about the benefits and usefulness of Twitting.  

And, in today's NYT, David Carr takes his own stab at it. Don't be shy--this is a topic that anybody should chime in about--so we invite you to post your own opinion!